Queer PowerPoint: A Review

A Review of Xanthe Dobbie and Harriet Gilles' Queer PowerPoint event for F.O.L.A. [AKL].

As anticipated, the glorious chaos, over-sharing and nerding out night that was Queer PowerPoint in Auckland was nothing less than a resounding success. From explicit fanon art, to conveyor toaster celebration, and even deep-diving into the founding tenets of Alcoholics Anonymous, each presentation star-wiped its way into the audience’s hearts and was met with many a giggle, clap, and even the occasional gasp of profound realisation.

Harriet Gilles’ opening presentation warmed the audience up to moments of both uncontrollable laughter and deep anti-capitalistic ambition. Thus is the power of Queer PowerPoint, and - coincidentally - AA founder Bill Wilson. While his Wikipedia page deserves a perusal in and of itself, Gilles took us on her journey between drinking and sobriety and drinking again, with several pit-stops outlining why the AA principles have created an almost unheard of community based on empathy, kindness and social wellbeing.

In a confusing turn of events, the next PowerPoint took us through “A Chronology of JoJo Siwa.” Admittedly, even my cynical outlook on the person who claims she invented gay pop was quickly overturned after hearing her disconcerting life story. From the very first bleaching of her hair at 18 months, to the genuine onslaught of abuse received in her time on Dance Moms, and the general chaos that followed her coming out, and recent musical releases - it was a journey to say the least. It’s more than fair to say that by the end of the presentation, most of the crowd was just about ready to fight not only JoJo’s mother, but the child star system in itself.

What occurred next can only be described as a slideshow of a gay man’s discovery not only of his sexuality, but of his artistic talents, alongside an illustrated history of his relationship with PaintChat. Prequelled with a warning for (literal) graphic nudity, the audience’s hollers accompanied the presentation with every new drawing that appeared (“that’s how he learnt to draw hands?!”). Luckily, the presenter had backed up many of the (quite spicy) illustrations on hard drives, without which everything would have been lost to the deep realms of a form of Internet no longer compatible with modern technology. Unfortunately, however, the same cannot be said for the friendships forged through this collaborative artistic platform - the audience mourned with the presenter the impossibility of such free creative play in today’s world, where the only art seen online is polished, perfect and branded with an air-tight identity and look, leaving no room for self-discovery and the judgement-free making of mistakes.

Fourth, and most flamboyantly, we received a spell-binding lecture on the queer essence of light on all its shapes, colours and iterations. Despite the technical difficulties of changing slides with nails made of long fabric strips, the presenter gave nothing less than a scientific, philosophical and queer story of the fleshy, emotional and impulsive essence of orientation, whether it be in terms of lighting, or sexuality. As if baptised into a new world of understanding, the audience realised what we always knew to be true: everything is gay.

And finally, for the coup de grace, Xanthe Dobbie enlightened us all to the exquisite perfection of breakfast buffets, taking us step by step through the ways these divine feasts satisfy Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I’m sure we’re all familiar with the pyramid, and the various iterations that have become memes online - this particular version included the following: an abundance of all varieties of foods (physiological needs), a series of known dishes available (safety needs), the space of a non-judgemental zone (love & belonging), social acceptance of all identities (esteem), and last but not least, alchemy itself (self-actualisation) - you had to be there for that last one. 

Ending on the raucous applause and love for the toaster conveyor, the divine machinery of the breakfast buffet system, the night closed with everyone sufficiently educated, enlightened, and elevated to a higher plain of queer joy and understanding. Suffice to say, it was one of the best events this writer has ever attended, and I shall never underestimate the power of gay nerds or PowerPoint ever again.